When I was small I used to close the fridge door really slowly just to see when the light went out

An awkward title, well, it just symbolizes the awkward mood swings I go into now and then. It seems for a moment as if the whole world was conspiring against me, and in the next moment the whole world lights my path, and this is not something new that’s happening to me, I have been going through all this since a long time now.

I remember how when I was small I used to close the refrigerator door really slowly just to see when the light went out. And I noticed, it always went out a fraction of a second before the door was closed. And then I grew up and read about the Butterfly Effect. Yeah, do not try to connect the former two lines, you won’t be able to. But I realised something important through this small fridge game of mine. The light always goes out before everything closes. You can always see the light going out, and be sure that something is going to close after this. Like for example, tube-lights going out before going to sleep, or the light of love going out before an actual break-up, which brings me to what I analyzed. Nothing happens all of a sudden, everything is a gradual process.

The darkest hour is before the dawn. But the converse is not true. Similarly, a put out of the lights of love does surely signify the end of it, but the end of it need not signify the putting out of the light from one’s heart. And though you may feel what I am writing is utter bullshit, and in some corner of the mind even I feel so, I actually am not.

When I started writing this blog, I had a motive. A motive to reach to specific people my thoughts. The mission remained incomplete. The motives changed. Now I write only for my pleasure. When I was small I won essay competitions. Yet I find it difficult to write in prose now. I prefer poetry, not only because it’s more beautiful, but because it’s an ability to express your feelings in a restricted environment. I do not have any ideals, I was never in this in the first place. I never read poems, except for the ones coming in the final examination. I used to read novels, but stopped after I read “The Monk Who Sold his Ferrari”, it was such a bore. I wanted to write in my blog an autobiography, but its draft wasn’t accepted by people who were characters in the narrative. I had to drop the idea. I posted every day, or at least every alternate day earlier, now I don’t. Not that I have less time, but that there are few things which I put up nowadays. I still write much more.

Dear eyelashes, wishbones, dandelions, pennies, shooting stars, 11:11, and birthday candles. Do your job.

Now that was the collection of the most unrelated facts u must ever have read!Β 

12 thoughts on “When I was small I used to close the fridge door really slowly just to see when the light went out

  1. hi there, I could relate to a lot of what you said. My blog right now is just for ME to vent mostly! And I have trouble getting thru a lot of books that are supposedly great…I find them boring.


    1. Hey thanx for the comment. πŸ™‚ And I wud suggest you to wiki the book’s name and read its synopsis, if you like it then go for the book, it saves a lot of time which would otherwise be spent in reading books you do not appreciate. πŸ™‚


  2. I used to do this too, I didn’t understand though why the light just couldn’t go out when the door shut! That’s how it’s supposed to be. I worked out the mechanics and even tried to stick my arm in against the level that quells the light, of course it didn’t work and the light still went out. You’re right, things extinguish slowly before finality, but another light is ready to be switched on. P.S. I loved The Alchemist and if I ever come across Monk/Ferrari I will now know to a.v.o.i.d.!!!


    1. Thnx. πŸ™‚ Will be posting more soon. Right now am in the preparation stage for a fatal war with my end sems.. 😦 Can’t focus on writing anything. My subjects this semester suck big time! 😦


  3. Hahaha I did that too as a kid, watching the lights of the fridge go out! πŸ˜€ n I HATE the stupid monk with the his stupid ferrari too! So bloody BORING!
    And a woderful post, this one was πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚
    Don’t know if u still want the original motive for writing this blog to be accomplished, bt hope it does πŸ˜‰ n al ur wishes too πŸ™‚


    1. Lol, I still remember my friend had given me the two novels “The Alchemist” and “The Monk Who Sold His *fucking* Ferrari” together, and she said both are good. I started with the Alchemist, was quite enthralled by it, and had high hopes when I was about to start with the monk. Robin Sharma shattered all my hopes. 😦

      And as far as the motives go, they have changed. And I have quite a much accomplished what my current motives are: pleasing myself and my audience. πŸ™‚


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